Tens of thousands of women in western New York have joined a Facebook group to help them determine if they are dating the same man.
A Facebook group titled “Are We Dating The Same Guy? | Buffalo / 716 / WNY” has nearly 44,000 members in Buffalo, Niagara Falls, and the surrounding areas. According to its description, it was set up to “protect and empower other women while warning each other of men who might be liars, cheaters, abusers, or exhibit any type of toxic or dangerous behavior.”
The group’s descriptions lay out three specific uses for the page: to “warn other girls about toxic men,” to “inquire about men you’re seeing or who you just met to see if anyone has had any experiences with that person / to check to see if anyone posted any warnings about a man,” and to provide a “safe space for relationship support and advice in general.”
The group’s rules include avoiding negative language, including “name calling, assumptions, suspicions, possible defamation, or even words like ‘crazy’, ‘ghosted’, or ‘weird.’”
Personal or contact information, such as “last names, social media handles, phone numbers, addresses,” and names of employers, are also forbidden.
The group also has a policy against screenshotting or leaking information in posts, but warns members, “we can’t guarantee that something said in the group won’t be leaked by another girl.” The group also allows anonymous posts using either Facebook’s anonymous posting feature or by having another member post on an anonymous member’s behalf.
“When I started to see the support that the group brought and people standing up for themselves and saying look, ‘here’s what I went through, you don’t have to believe me, but this was what my experience was.’ When I started to see that, I was like, you know, women should always support other women,” WGRZ quoted group member Jessica Brandi as saying.
The outlet noted there is a similar group for men in the area, and other groups serving different geographical areas exist throughout the country.