A Chicago man is suing dozens of women over negative reviews he received in the popular Facebook group, “Are We Dating the Same Guy?”
Nikko D’Ambrosio filed a lawsuit against 27 women over comments posted to the Chicago edition of the “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” Facebook page, where the 32-year-old was described as “very clingy,” and accused of “ghosting” a woman after engaging in sexual relations with her, according to a report by the New York Post.
D’Ambrosio says his reputation was tarnished after women shared his name and photo in the private Facebook group for Chicago, which boasts more than 88,000 members.
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The man is claiming that he has been subjected to defamation, doxing, and invasion of privacy, according to a complaint filed in the Northern District of Illinois earlier this month.
The private group, which originated in New York City, is part of a larger network of heavily-moderated, women-only Facebook pages, in which women regularly share names and photos of men, asking their community if anyone has had any personal experience with their upcoming date.
Men are posted to “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” Facebook pages for a variety of reasons.
Typically, women post men asking other women if they know of any “red flags” or “tea” (a slang term referring to personal stories that might provide then with insightful information) regarding their upcoming first date, or someone they have been on a few dates with.
Sometimes, after having become suspicious with their significant other, women will post their boyfriends or husbands to the private group, asking their community if anyone else is dating the man they are in a relationship with.
Other women who have had bad experiences with a date will take to the Facebook group to post the man’s information in an apparent attempt to warn others in the community. These warnings can include a wide variety of claims — anything from allegations of a man being too “pushy” to alleged assault or attempts of spiking a woman’s drink.
In D’Ambrosio’s case, he was posted to the group by women who claimed he was “very pushy,” as well as a man who “ghosts” after sex.
“Very clingy very fast. Flaunted money very awkwardly and kept talking about how I don’t want to see his bad side, especially when he was on business calls,” one member shared to the group, according to screenshots obtained by the New York Post.
Another woman took the comment section of the post to warn others: “I went out with him a few times just over a year ago — he told me what I wanted to hear until I slept with him and then he ghosted… I’d steer clear.”
“He’s been posted here before,” a third commented. “The poster said he sent her a slew of texts calling her names because she didn’t want to spend the night with him.”
D’Ambrosio, meanwhile, claims in his lawsuit that he met the woman who made the original post about him at an event in Chicago last year, and that they had consensual sex that same night.
After that, the two met up for a few more dates, D’Ambrosio said, adding that the dates were “unremarkable,” and that he “never engaged in an exclusive dating relationship” with the woman.
D’Ambrosio claims the woman in question later took to the popular Facebook page to spread lies about him, which then sparked a flurry of other women posting comments, defaming him.
“The defendants broadcast their outrageous, cruel, and malicious lies about the plaintiff with knowledge that the statements were false or with reckless disregard as whether or not they were true,” the complaint reads.
The lawsuit goes on to claim that the women’s “wrongful conduct is so outrageous in character and so extreme in degree that it is beyond all possible bounds of decency and is to be regarded as atrocious and utterly intolerable in a civilized community.”
D’Ambrosio is seeking $75 million in damages in a lawsuit that reportedly targets 27 women, including moderators of the Facebook page, and a number of Jane Does, as well as numerous parts of Meta — Facebook’s parent company.
There exists an “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” Facebook page for virtually every major city in the United States, with each page boasting tens — and sometimes hundreds — of thousands of members.
The “Are We Dating The Same Guy? New York City” Facebook page, for example, boasts 133,000 members. There’s also a page for Los Angeles (49,000 members), Nashville (57,000), Houston (43,000), Cleveland (49,000), and Boston (60,000), among many others.
Members are only accepted to join an “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” Facebook group after an administrator has verified them to be an actual woman.
You can follow Alana Mastrangelo on Facebook and X/Twitter at @ARmastrangelo, and on Instagram.