Winter has arrived.
With snowy and quiet landscapes and cozy evenings under a blanket with a warm beverage.
But also with shorter days that can be both slippery and ice cold. Motivation may be sinking during this time (it often does for me at least). And stress might be on the rise.
So in today’s post I’d like to share something that can help you to feel better during this season. This is 90 of the most hilarious, positive and funny winter quotes.
Use them in texts, group chats and on social media like Instagram to spread the positive vibes.
And use them yourself too to have a couple of good laughs, to not take things too seriously and to reduce those stress levels.
Funny Winter Quotes That Will Make You Laugh and Relieve Stress
“I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad mood.”
– Bill Watterson
“It snowed last year too: I made a snowman and my brother knocked it down and I knocked my brother down and then we had tea.”
– Dylan Thomas
“For every snowflake that falls, an idiot forgets how to drive.”
– Unknown
“The problem with winter sports is that – follow me closely here – they generally take place in winter.”
– Dave Barry
“Winter is nature’s way of saying, ‘Up yours.’”
– Robert Byrne
“It was so cold I almost got married.”
– Shelley Winters
“Winter is not a season, it’s an occupation.”
– Sinclair Lewis
“As winter approaches – bringing cold weather and family drama – we crave page-turners, books made for long nights and tryptophan-induced sloth.”
– Sarah MacLean
“It was so cold today that I saw a dog chasing a cat, and the dog was walking.”
– Mickey Rivers
“A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water.”
– Carl Reiner
“I was just thinking, if it is really religion with these nudist colonies, they sure must turn atheists in the wintertime.”
– Will Rogers
“There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.”
– Billy Connolly
“Winter, I wrote, was akin to living inside a refrigerator.”
– Okey Ndibe
“Welcome to winter, when fifty percent of drivers should have their licenses temporarily suspended.”
– Kelley Armstrong
“The smallest snowstorm on record took place an hour ago in my back yard. It was approximately two flakes. I waited for more to fall, but that was it.”
– Richard Brautigan
“Imagine if fire extinguishers were full of snow. Imagine the fun we could have.”
– Neil Hilborn
“They say that there can never be two snowflakes that are exactly alike, but has anyone checked lately?”
– Terry Pratchett
“Minneapolis has two seasons: Road Removal and Snow Repair.”
– Steven Brust
“When I was young, I loved summer and hated winter. When I got older I loved winter and hated summer. Now that I’m even older, and wiser, I hate both summer and winter.”
– Jarod Kintz
“Winter blues are cured every time with a potato gratin paired with a roast chicken.”
– Alexandra Guarnaschelli
“Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.”
– Bill Watterson
“I cannot feel my legs from the waist down any longer. But who cares? I look good and that’s all that matters. And when I die of hypothermia for wearing formal shorts in winter, tell them to put that on my tombstone.”
– Eliza Coupe
“You should see my corgis at sunset in the snow. It’s their finest hour. About five o’clock they glow like copper. Then they come in and lie in front of the fire like a string of sausages.”
– Tasha Tudor
“The world was furred with late spring snow. It was the soft, thick stuff that excites you unless you are driving or half dead, packing snow already falling in caterpillars off the greening branches.”
– Marian Engel
Short Funny Winter Vibes Quotes for Your Instagram
“Snow brings a special quality with it – the power to stop life as you know it dead in its tracks.”
– Nancy Hatch Woodward
“The snow doesn’t give a soft white damn whom it touches.”
– E.E. Cummings
“A man says a lot of things in summer he doesn’t mean in winter.”
– Patricia Briggs
“You can’t get too much winter in the winter.”
– Robert Frost
“I love snow for the same reason I love Christmas. It brings people together whilst time stands still.”
– Rachel Cohn
“Nothing burns like the cold.”
– George R. R. Martin
“Winter is on my head, but eternal spring is in my heart.”
– Victor Hugo
“The first snow is like the first love.”
– Lara Biyuts
“There are only two seasons – winter and Baseball.”
– Bill Veeck
“To appreciate the beauty of a snowflake it is necessary to stand out in the cold.”
– Aristotle
“Every mile is two in the winter.”
– George Herbert
“Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories.”
– Deborah Kerr
“If you think it’s too cold for a walk, just remember: it’s also too cold for a fast food drive-thru.”
– Unknown
“Cold weather means a cozy day at home and hot chocolate at the ready.”
– Unknown
“The very fact of snow is such an amazement.”
– Roger Ebert
“I love the snow, but I hate the cold. This is a weird relationship I have with winter.”
– Rachael Ray
“My favorite winter activity is going back inside and putting my pajamas on.”
– Unknown
“There’s no such thing as bad weather – only the wrong clothes.”
– Billy Connolly
Hilarious Winter Quotes for Work (Share with Co-Workers on a Boring Day)
“Never take a job where winter winds can blow up your pants.”
– Geraldo Rivera
“Winter: when everyday activities take three times as long because you have to find your gloves.”
– Unknown
“Hard work never killed anybody, but why take the chance?”
– Edgar Bergen
“I go to the gym three days a week. You have to or else – I don’t want to be the guy that dies shoveling snow.”
– Douglas Coupland
“I got a cold weather workout by scraping off my windshield this morning.”
– Unknown
“Nothing is as easy to make as a promise this winter to do something next summer; this is how commencement speakers are caught.”
– Sydney J. Harris
“Winter is the time of promise because there is so little to do – or because you can now and then permit yourself the luxury of thinking so.”
– Stanley Crawford
“It’s so cold outside, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.”
– Unknown
“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.”
– Oscar Wilde
“I’m not a winter person. I should be a bear and just hibernate.”
– Unknown
“The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.”
– Robert Frost
“Don’t worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you’ll have to ram them down people’s throats.”
– Howard Aiken
Funny Winter Quotes for Your Letterboard
“A snowball in the face is surely the perfect beginning to a lasting friendship.”
– Markus Zusak
“Snow is like a manic pixie dream girl: fun and whimsical when you encounter it only through the barrier of a movie screen – but absolute misery to have to put up with in real life.”
– Alexandra Petri
“The light made the snowballs look yellow. Or at least I hoped that was the cause.”
– Gary D. Schmidt
“One of the very best reasons for having children is to be reminded of the incomparable joys of a snow day.”
– Susan Orlean
“There’s no such thing as bad weather, just soft people.”
– Bill Bowerman
“I grew up in Chicago, and there was always snow. In Los Angeles there never was, so we would always import snow!”
– David Hasselhoff
“And some places you been before are so great that you don’t ever mind going back. Some places you been before you don’t ever want to go back, you know, like Montreal in the Winter.”
– Morgan Freeman
“I love you because no two snowflakes are alike, and it is possible, if you stand tippy-toe, to walk between the raindrops.”
– Nikki Giovanni
“No animal, according to the rules of animal-etiquette, is ever expected to do anything strenuous, or heroic, or even moderately active during the off-season of winter.”
– Kenneth Grahame
“How the tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, in the icy air of night!”
– Edgar Allan Poe
“We panic if there’s two centimeters of snow in London.”
– Sam Riley
“Sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces us up, snow is exhilarating; there is really no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather.”
– John Ruskin
“There’s no such thing as bad weather, only inappropriate clothing.”
– Ranulph Fiennes
“My old grandmother always used to say, Summer friends will melt away like summer snows, but winter friends are friends forever.”
– George R.R. Martin
Funny Winter Quotes for a Happy New Year
“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.”
– William E. Vaughan
“Here’s to another year of terrible decisions with wonderful friends.”
– Alice Jones
“Every New Year’s I have the same question: How did I get home?”
– Melanie White
“It wouldn’t be New Year’s if I didn’t have regrets.”
– William Thomas
“A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.”
– Oscar Wilde
“May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.”
– Joey Lauren Adams
“Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.”
– Unknown
“Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve. Middle age is when you’re forced to.”
– Bill Vaughan
“I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person.”
– Sandra Shea
“You know how I always dread the whole year? Well, this time I’m only going to dread one day at a time.”
– Charlie Brown
“Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.”
– George Bernard Shaw
“My New Year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with either wine, vodka, or whiskey.”
– Blackie Lawless
“I’m a little bit older, a little bit wiser, a little bit rounder, but still none the wiser.”
– Robert Paul
“Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else’s path unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost.”
– Ellen DeGeneres
“Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better person.”
– Benjamin Franklin
“Many years ago, I resolved never to bother with New Year’s resolutions, and I’ve stuck with it ever since.”
– Dave Beard
“Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn’t it, of a long line of proven criminals?”
– Ogden Nash
“Here’s to another year of pretending I like you people.”
– Sandra Shea
“Don’t be so worried about what you eat between Christmas and New Year’s. Worry more about what you eat between New Year’s and Christmas.”
– Unknown
“A New Year’s resolution is something that makes you anxious until February when you can forget about it.”
– Dave Barry
Want more laughs for the winter season? Then check out these funny Christmas quotes, this one with funny New Year quotes and also this post that’s full of hilarious work quotes.