Emily Ratajkowski has revealed how she deliberately reinvented herself after the collapse of her marriage, adopting what she described as a “villain” persona as she navigated divorce, single motherhood and a new chapter of dating in her early 30s.
RadarOnline.com can reveal the 35-year-old model, author and actress opened up about the transformation in a new essay, reflecting on life after her 2022 split from film producer Sebastian Bear-McClard, 45.
The pair had been married for four years and share a son, Sylvester, now five.
In her latest candid piece, Ratajkowski described how the end of her marriage prompted a period of self-exploration, dating and personal reinvention as she sought to move beyond the expectations she felt had previously shaped her identity.
A source told us: “Emily wanted to reclaim control of her life after the divorce. The version of herself she describes wasn’t about seeking sympathy or dwelling on heartbreak, but about creating a stronger, more confident identity during a difficult period.
“She felt liberated by the experience. Rather than viewing herself as someone who had been defeated by a failed marriage, she embraced a character that felt powerful, independent and completely unapologetic.”
In the essay, Ratajkowski wrote: “I decided to f— my way into a new kind of woman. I wanted to destroy the Madonna, the special girl I’d worked so hard to be before an eight-pound baby had torn my vagina in two, and replace her with the whore.”
Describing the weeks immediately following the separation, she added: “I wish I could say I’d started to date slowly… but the truth is just a week after my split, I found myself in Brooklyn, a shell-shocked and sleepless version of myself.
“‘I just need a distraction,’ I’d said, tasking my friends, who had giddily gotten to work by texting every unattached and (relatively) un-embarrassing man they knew.”
According to Ratajkowski, one friend introduced her to a DJ who became an important figure during the early stages of her post-divorce life.
While she emphasized the relationship never progressed beyond friendship, she said the experience marked the beginning of a broader personal shift.
Ratajkowski wrote: “The character I’d learned to embody after my divorce, in my period of compulsively dating, was a villain: Poison Ivy. Catwoman.
“Sexual but scary, and she drank gin martinis. Many, many gin martinis. She was not tragic. Nothing close to a victim. No-one needed to feel sorry for her. In fact, they should all be jealous.”
Those close to the model said the essay reflects lessons she drew from the breakdown of her marriage and her experience raising a child while building a career in New York.
One source said: “Emily came away from her divorce with a very different perspective on independence. She realized she was capable of creating a fulfilling life on her own terms and didn’t need to define herself through a partnership.”
Ratajkowski also described the transformation as her “villain origin story” and said it altered how she viewed relationships and solitude.
She wrote: “I’d seen too much, discovered what many women do only when they get divorced in their mid-40s. I’d lived through the failure of a unit, yet I was barely into my 30s.
“Being a New Yorker made being a single mom feel sexier and bohemian, or at least that’s what I told myself.”