Predictions that Taylor Swift would make a cameo on “Saturday Night Live” with host Dakota Johnson came to fruition when the duo appeared together in the opening monologue.
After Johnson joked about her failed relationships, she said “I have really good friends. They don’t judge me, they’re really supportive. Ladies and gentlemen, my literal therapist.”
Swift then appeared onscreen — in what one Swiftie on X delightedly described as a “Taylor Swift jump scare” — and said, “I’m not your therapist, actually. You just show up once a week at my house with an empty bottle of wine and ask if I want some… You flop on my couch and overshare and every so often I say ‘Damn, that’s crazy,’” Swift continued. “And then you say…”
“Sleepover, yay!” said Johnson.
“Then I give you Pedialyte and my security drives you home,” Swift said.
Then the subject returned to Johnson’s dating life. Earlier in the monologue, after jokes about her “tight-ass latex dress” and the failure of “Madame Web,” the actress said, “What else has happened since the last time I hosted? Well, I went through two very public, very lame breakups with two very awesome musicians,” referring to Coldplay’s Chris Martin and Role Model. “Looking for a third,” she added. Mentioning that her new film “Verity” is a “psychosexual erotic thriller,” she noted, “So is dating musicians. Some of them don’t wear shoes, some of them are terrible in bed, but all of them are in my DMs. It’s not my fault, though. Some people leave concerts with merch, and I leave concerts with a two-and-a-half-year relationship.”
WIth Swift beside her minutes later, Johnson picked up the subject and continued, “Just quickly while we’re on the subject of musicians, I think actually I’m doing a public service by dating them, because, ladies, I am saving you a lot of money on Zoloft. So you’re welcome, America. And also England. And parts of Ireland. And Cleveland,” a reference to Travis Kelce, which led to the rejoinder, “Allegedly.”
Swift then squealed “It’s her birthday!” — just slightly prematurely, as Johnson had earlier announced her birthday would be arriving at midnight.
During the goodnights at the end of the episode, Swift brought a birthday cake out for Johnson.
There was no question of Swift doing a musical number on the episode, since the musical guest had long since been announced as Turnstile. But the singer turning up at some point on “SNL” this season seemed like an inevitability after Swift participated in an Easter egg-laden “Law & Order SVU” sketch on the Emmys. Behind her in the skit, a large “Saturday Night Live” emblem was tacked to a bulletin board… not her subtlest clue ever.